It’s been some time since I’ve written anything.
And to be honest, I feel pretty empty when I don’t have the time,
energy or motivation to put words onto sheets of paper.
It’s been a mightily taxing week – a promotion at work brought with
it new, and exciting challenges. But I almost forgot that the job I have, while
important, isn’t as crucial as so many other aspects of my life.
A wonderful evening with family a few nights ago was just the
‘centering’ I needed after a whirlwind couple of days, and it got me thinking –
one of the ultimate blessings that accompany growing older is being able to
make better decisions based on past mistakes.
I’ve read a ton of quotes along the lines of ‘mistakes are building
blocks to success’ blah blah blah. They annoyed me to no end because, for the
most part, mistakes felt like nothing more than mistakes – they were stupid, unnecessary, misguided and put me
several steps back from the point I had gotten to. Basically, I saw no benefit
in them.
But more and more, I am realizing that these mistakes and/or periods
of misguided lifestyles and decision-making are prepping all of us for a much
happier future. It sucks significantly that it takes years of trial and error
to figure it all out, and I know I have many more mistakes to make, but I
believe the end result will make for a happier ME.
Here are eight daft things I’ll hopefully never do again:
WAIT… FOR MY DEEPEST DESIRES TO JUST FALL INTO PLACE
It simply doesn’t happen. You don’t just end up in your own
apartment, find yourself in a foreign country or cruise around town in the type
of car you’ve always admired. You actually need to throw caution (and
depressingly, some money) to the wind and make it happen.
EAT… A MCDONALD’S BEEF BURGER
The double quarter pounder used to be my go-to meal on the way home
from a club. Then, suddenly, one day I realised it was revolting: this weird
juice bursts out of it when you bite it, the cheese is an abnormally rich layer
of yellow plastic and Jamie Oliver showed us how the thing is made.
(It also helps that most of the time, the thought of clubbing leaves
me feeling bilious, eliminating the need for these late-night binges.)
WASTE… HOURS OF MY LIFE IN TRAFFIC
I genuinely feel like I’ve been a much happier, healthier person
since I moved out of home, not because I’ve been stuffing my face with carrots
and cauliflower, but because I no longer spend two hours of my day in a car. Yes,
it can be very problematic or even impossible for a family to move to an area
close enough to work, where traffic would be minimal. But if you can do it, don’t hesitate – your body
and mind will be ever so grateful.
FORGET… TO BACK UP THE DATA ON MY LAPTOP
One would think I’d have learnt my lesson when my laptop crashed
about four years ago. But it took a second crash for me to take the time out to
back up my data.
It’s kind of sad that our emotions can be so immeasurably affected
by a non-functioning, non-living concoction of plastic and metal, but that’s
the way it is in 2014 and the best thing we can all do is prepare for the
worst.
NEGLECT… MY HEALTH
I once read somewhere that “youth is wasted on the youth” and it’s
equally true when it comes to the state of our bodies. There we are, at 19 or
20, snacking on fried chicken at 3am after a hard night of partying (i.e.
drinking) – exercise only comes in the form of running to a lecture that we’re
late for and getting enough sleep is way down on the list of priorities.
It’s profound to see the changed perspective when it comes to my
health and those of my peers, now that 30 is within sight for us. But often,
we’re a bit too late; years of neglect leaves many of us looking and feeling
sluggish and with all kinds of health issues, like digestive disorders. These
don’t occur by chance – they’re the result of youthful ignorance.
Today, I am two months into a type of fitness class that I would
have scoffed at just a year ago, and I actually spend money on vegetables now.
I still have a long way to go before I can call myself ‘healthy’
with complete confidence, but I’ve started the process of enhanced
consciousness and once you do, the improvements are easy to see and feel.
TRY… TO KEEP A DIARY
I always admire the people who walk around with their leather-bound
diaries and Parker Pens, ready to jot down anything important whenever it’s
required – it communicates organisation, class and authenticity.
But for someone that enjoys writing, I am completely incapable of
keeping a diary. The first day always goes well… until I misplace my pen,
forget the diary on the kitchen counter or keep it with me and forget that the
thing exists in the first place.
I blame the digital world. Between emails, inbox messages, cell
phone reminders and the fuzzy mental notes blowing around in my head, a diary
is just too methodical.
ALLOW… MYSELF TO BE WALKED OVER BY LOUDER, BIGGER, BRASHER PEOPLE
I did this throughout school, pretty much. And why wouldn’t I? After
all, standing up to people who took joy out of exploiting my smaller frame and
milder demeanour would likely only have resulted in me being beaten up. What’s
more maddening is that I continued to allow this to happen for some time after
high school.
While I still wouldn’t initiate anything resembling a physical fight
right now (who the hell has time for that, seriously?), the days of anyone
speaking down to me are long gone. Unfortunately for them, I respect myself too
much and know too much about the world to allow that to happen. Whether inside
or outside of a professional environment, it’s unbelievably rewarding to find
that fewer and fewer people are intimidating to me.
FORGET… TO TAKE THINGS ONE DAY AT A TIME
#1DayAtATime – it’s a little chant I carry around in my head with me
every day as of a week or two ago. It’s given me strength and motivated me to
do better. We simply can’t live in the future and obsess over what we need to
do within a month or a year. That is a crazy, toxic way to live.
What we can and must do is
make the most of each day. The reason we need sleep after about sixteen hours
of waking up is because it is the natural cycle of our physical bodies –
likewise, our minds can’t be expected to deal with the burdens of months of
to-do lists. By all means, throw yourself into a new day 100%, but resist the
temptation to group all your tasks as an encyclopaedia-sized list which must be
conquered NOW! Guess what? You can’t finish that entire jar of Yum-Yum ultra
creamy peanut butter by dumping it onto a single slice of bread. You will most
certainly vomit. But, give yourself a few weeks, spread it all out a bit more
evenly, and it will be done.
That’s about it for tonight’s tirade. Goodness knows how much longer
this list is going to get in the future – but the longer it is, the easier the
path to sustained happiness will be.